Mediation for couples

In this series William Giles, the Mediator at Woollcombe Yonge, provides guidance as to how couples attending mediation can make the best of that mediation and give themselves the best possible opportunity to negotiate a settlement.

Options

 Mediation is voluntary and couples who enter into it do so on the basis that it is a forward looking process aimed at resolving the differences that have arisen as a result of separation.

Couples who attend mediation are usually committed and determined to reach a solution to their problems.

Mediators usually undertake a process of gathering information, particularly in financial matters, where they will request documentation in order to clarify what the assets, income, liabilities and needs of the parties are.  This process is known as full and frank disclosure.

Thereafter the Mediator will undoubtedly wish to consider the options going forward for the couple.

Some people are concerned that the other party will come to mediation with a fixed idea about what is a suitable resolution.  It is important for the couple to carefully consider all options.  It is common the couple may become focused on specific solutions, perhaps based upon advice they have received from Solicitors or friends.  However, there are often a considerable number of alternative options which may be more beneficial to themselves and their children.  The Mediator will assist the couple in how to achieve a fair solution, which is ultimately what most people want.  A spirit of compromise, considering the other party’s views and reaching a common ground will undoubtedly be more likely to lead to a negotiated settlement.

William Giles is a Family Law Solicitor, Mediator and Collaborative Practitioner with Woollcombe Yonge Solicitors.  Our mediation practice is known as WY Mediation.  For initial free discussion with Will Giles please telephone him on (01752) 660384.

Preparation for the mediation meeting

Before the mediation takes place give time to consider the following:

Carefully consider in mediation about the financial situation all of the documentation that you may have prepared and that you may have been provided with. This could include the open financial statement prepared by a Mediator following a previous mediation, an interim Memorandum of Understanding, or documents that have been exchanged between the parties prior to or during the mediation process.

Make a list about what you think is important to the other person, what they may wish to achieve in order of priority.

Think about how a solution to the problem could be found so that you can both achieve as much as possible from each list.

Think about where compromises may be made.

Think about, for example, in financial issues about whether you are each budgeting enough to afford where you are going to live. Would you want to live where the other person could live based upon the budget?

Is the solution you are thinking about fair to both of you?

William Giles is a Family Law Solicitor, Mediator and Collaborative Practitioner with Woollcombe Yonge Solicitors.  Our mediation practice is known as WY Mediation.  For initial free discussion with Will Giles please telephone him on (01752) 660384.